“I’m Awesome!” I love to hear my granddaughter happily share this with me when I ask her what she is. This little lady is creative, intelligent, expressive and loves to learn. Knowing that these are important years where she is forming her beliefs I am very conscious of what I say and how I say it. You see I have been working alot with Limiting Beliefs in my own journey and with this learning I know better how to communicate with children so they can create their own positive beliefs. I’m aware of this, not only with my granddaughter, but other children as well.
Nearly all of our beliefs are formed in our early childhood. As Dr. Wayne Dyer shares we are born with unlimited potential. We form our beliefs (which are thoughts we believe are our truths) from our parents, relatives, teachers and others as well as from experiences we have during childhood. Once they are formed, we start looking for things that reinforce them – until we become aware of the fact that they aren’t necessarily true – and then begins the work to “weed out” the limiting beliefs and plant new ones that allow us to grow with limitless potential.
Spring is a perfect time for growing a garden of positive beliefs. We often think of Spring as a “fresh start’ where we can do some spring cleaning, clearing out closets and best yet, growing beautiful gardens. Like any garden, creating Victory Garden begins with weeding out your Limiting Beliefs. To grow any garden, you need to begin with rich soil, a variety of seeds and nutrients. The weeding can be challenging but it is doable, the first step is becoming conscious of your thoughts. I did this through journaling my thoughts. I did this for 2 weeks to see what was coming up over and over again. It really wasn’t surprising when I went back and read my journal. What I have found, that we can find a “tribe” of people who will positively support us as we travel this journey of creating our “Victory” garden of positive beliefs. I’ve found mine. I am happy to create that tribe of support for single moms and single dads and all of our children.
I’d like to invite you to our Successful Single Parents Facebook Group so we can share in conversations, information and positive support.
Liz M Raymond
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For months now I have been struggling with feelings of frustration and anxiety.
Life hasn’t been cooperating like it has in the past. As I have been struggling with my own money challenges I have had to shift much of my focus away from SPFS. Much of my effort has been spent at bringing in work in my main gig, Liz M Raymond Professional Business Organizer. PBO not only provides me with funds to support my day to day financial responsibilities, but it also helps to fund SPFS (my baby) while we are growing. While focusing on one, the other loses out, or at least temporarily suffers. I am excited for the new opportunities and successes that members of our planning team have found in their lives and businesses. With their successes their priorities require a shift.
With the planning of the 2nd Annual Single Parenting for Success Symposium in full gear I noticed that there were important aspects of the event that were not coming together. I began to feel that the Universe was sending me a message. Someone pointed out that March 26th – the selected date – was on Easter Weekend — my heart sank and I began to panic. I knew with Easter attendance at the Symposium would be very low.
My vision to create a fabulous event that would bring more awesome resources and celebrations to #Ottawa #SingleMoms and #SingleDads was slipping away. “Open Talk” is important. There are conversations that need to be had and an opportunity to share with each other that would release stigmas and discomfort. This event matters too much to leave it to chance.
I sat quietly in my room on the edge of my bed. No tears were shed, only deep breaths were taken as I closed eyes to ask my guides what I should do. It wasn’t long when I allowed myself to listen intently to my intuition – another date had to be chosen. I picked up my cellphone and called a dear friend of mine, someone who has been with me from the start. The more we talked, the more she could hear that my intuition had already given me my answer. A new date was booked and another plan put in place. A new opportunity has appeared to create more mini-events in 2016 AND still celebrate #SingleParentsDay as it is meant to be celebrated — in 2017. A new calm fell over me as I trusted this is the right decision.
Sitting quiet and listening and learning to trust your intuition can help make decisions much easier.
Liz M Raymond
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Sometimes when faced with a puzzle we are left pondering a question where the answer isn’t always clear. For example, what comes first, the chicken or the egg? It is thus type of question I don’t spend an awful lot of time on. However, there has been one question that I have a definite answer to. Who do I look after first, me or my child? Not to say I don’t look after my children because I always have and do. But the one thing I have come to realize, is that if I don’t take care of myself, I will have nothing to give to my children. This appears to be a bit of a challenge for some. And for some they feel they need to focus on their children and not worry about their own needs. Yes, I said “needs”.
I’m sure you have heard how the flight attendants always tell parents to put the oxygen mask over themselves first and then their children. It is the same story of the mom who goes to the well for water. If there is no water in the well, she can’t offer any to her children. The well must be full. As parents, and especially single parents, we need to ensure our “well” is full so that we “have” to give of ourselves to our children. Think about yourself. There is absolutely nothing wrong with taking time to think about what fills you up, brings you joy, gives you that burst of energy to keep you going.
When I first became a single parent, I was so drained – drained of hope, faith, spirit. The struggles of my relationship and having stayed in it for too long, left nothing for my children, except for a mom in survival mode who was grieving for a relationship she thought she had, anger for all that was done to her and fear that she may not be able to provide for her children. Survival mode will drive you to protect your children but thrivor mode is life changing. As adults we need to keep growing, finding passion and joy. When our children see us happy and thriving, they also are happy and thriving, because we have so much more to give.
The first step towards exiting “surviving mode” and entering “thriving mode” is taking time to ask yourself a few questions. First – what makes me happy? sad? joyful? mad? If you can’t answer these questions, don’t fret, I couldn’t answer these questions either. Can you? We need to know who we are and what we believe, feel, need and want. The beginning of my journey started as I worked through a workbook called “Finding your WAY” – I call it the Who Are You manual.
Do you know who you are? What makes you happy? sad? joyful? mad? Let me help you create your own “owner’s manual”.
Interested in joining our Successful Single Parents Facebook group by clicking HERE
Liz M Raymond